Words unspoken.

When it comes to love, your kind of religion would not understand. But my kind of religion would. We share the same religion, why is it our way of life is different? I told you, that I liked you. I told you that I cared about you more than you think I do. You said, I should not lead this kind of life, that I will not be blessed. But you never said that you hate me, for liking you. I did not get the wrong idea, it was not my intention to pursue this feeling in the beginning, I truly understand that what I want, is not what you want. But aren't you being too cruel? Like, cutting ties with me? Somehow, I felt like I judged you wrong. I expected more from you. I thought that, you were gonna be more kind in handling me. I felt like, I have been loving the wrong person this whole time. And then, I realized that I actually loved someone else. They have the same face as you, but it was not you. I suddenly come to terms that, I have been loving the version of you, that I my s...

I always see myself as a calm and collected in whatever situation I was thrown into. As in, I will always try to think first and analyse the situation first before jumping into conclusions, or, I will play the closest scenarios that could happen if I were to do that, or I were to do this. I basically will not just follow my heart, my brain and logical thinking will lead most of all. So that, it will bring less damage to other people around me, other people finances, other people feelings, and me myself, literally in that sequence. So it really disturbs me that when it comes to you, I am completely in reverse stance. As like, my heart became a dictator in making decisions, even though the brain constantly giving warnings of what could possibly happen, which usually unfavourable, the heart still go and do the way it wants. When it comes to you, it feels like everything I do has completely different purpose, different attachment, different expectation and even brings out differen...

“No! You have to get married. You just, have to okay. Don’t say that you’ll might join the will-never-get-married people”, Joshy flashed out, almost sounded angry. The thing was, Jenny joked how she might be single even after 30, and those words really hit Joshy like a bullet. It was not suppose to but it will make sense if you see how he loved her from the very beginning. He could not be together with Jenny and he came to term that she has to be happily married with someone who deserves her. She deserves the world. So when she joked that way, how can Joshy not be panicked? He literally give in the love he wanted the most, for the sake of normality, and for the sake that he is not the one. She has to get married, she has to. If not, what would Joshy do with his heart? She has to be happy with someone, who is capable of loving her the way she always wanted. Jenny was confused with the gesture, but Joshy could not control his action, who would? “You have to get married, no matter wh...

Late night drives and night time movies, Yum those once a month expensive dinner, Wear the black sling bag back and earphones on. Volume high, with rhythmic steps. Clothes so comfortable, we can start dancing crazily To be completely honest, It’s not that we are actually alone, It’s just, sometimes things like these better done, alone. Maybe we are not too happy with the company Or, maybe we just enjoy and fun with our own mind And nothing to do with any company Can you imagine to be completely genuine And actually having a good time with the presence of our own self? Like a happy person should be. We are not shy, we are just uninterested. Of those going nowhere competitiveness Of those I am better than you, Silly jokes, making fun and non-stop sarcasms, Mate, life is too short for unnecessary judgments Why oh why we always start comparing. Hold up, We are not actually alone and sad, if that what you were thinking We are not anti-social, wha...